A week of wonderful moments

Thanks to my generous husband for sponsoring our trip to Cochin, Atul and I along with other members of our group, left Bahrain on March 21, 2008. Ah! I forgot to mention about the camp, is it not? It's a week-long spiritual camp organized by Chinmaya Society, Bahrain from 21-28 March, 2008 at Chinmaya International Foundation, Adi Shankara Nilayam, Veliyanad, a couple of hours drive from Cochin Airport.

With our limited bags and baggage, 14 children and 7 sevikas boarded Jet Airways flight in the morning hours of 21st March, displaying our blue jacket and ID cards attracting attention of passers-by and even immigration authorities, both at Bahrain and Cochin.

On 22nd March, 2008, we all played Holi in the ashram.
Having gone to Cochin, life is a waste if one hadn’t enjoyed Alleppey’s boat cruise… We went for a boat ride on 23rd March morning and were served hot appam and stew by in-house crew. The bedrooms were inviting to lie down but our team was more involved in dancing and singing. With my left knee pain, I enjoyed watching their performances with peals of laughter.

See the heaven on earth…… I was supposed to have reached heaven (or hell???) by now but still alive by His grace. We were walking on a low wall which separated the deep backwaters on one side and plush green trees on the other side, to drink tender coconut. In order to avoid straining my left knee, I kept a wrong foot and lo! instantly I fell on the right side (ground part). Had my fall been in the water, I would have viewed the sea world at least once ‘live’ before dissolving in the cosmos for ever! The simple reason is, I don’t know swimming. :D



Also visited Chottanikara devi temple (Did I cry seeing the Divine Mother? Yes, I did inwardly and uncontrollably) and one Vishnu temple and a Shiva temple. Temples in Kerala are so different from TN or North Indian temples. One needs to be fit and fine healthwise to pay a visit.

On 26th, we all made a visit to ashram gardens and did tree plantations as well. The pledge was taken by the sevikas to maintain the spirit.

In the evening of 27th March, we had valedictory function and cultural program. I was the M.C. (hehehe…). The kids performed a skit ‘Be Victorious’, ‘Dandiya dance’, Vedic Chanting, Bhajans, Presentation of Values etc.

Along with the above, we all learnt Vedic texts, bhajans, dasavatharam stothrams & stories etc. Children experienced a glimpse of ashram life and synchronized themselves perfectly with the atmosphere [Footwear to be arranged in order, chanting of slokas before and after food, washing of one’s plate, cups and glasses to be taken care of them, availability of food only at the ringing of bell, chanting of sloka to improve memory power, meditation on breathing etc etc].

Enjoyment is fine. But have I carried the values with me? Hope I am honest when I answer ‘yes’ to this question one day.

Finally, to spice up, Atul was flying high since 27th evening as soon as he got the message from his Dad that he stood first in his class. It was a pat on my back as well, for I too have studied equally with him. :D

Showcase

Amazing is your brilliance, O MAN
To see me in you for theories of your evolution

During my jungle wanderings I’ve met
Your clan of selfishness and articulate gimmicks
Defining the logic of reasoning and rationale

During my adventures to cities I’ve seen
Your race of brutal violence and intolerance
Exhibiting mal-nutritious positive emotions

During my surprise visits to houses I’ve witnessed
Your people indulging in heartless, weird gossips
Leaving behind ugly trails of restlessness and mistrust



You smile and eat and walk and breed
Just like me but more refined displaying your orderly brain
O MAN, I am the origin of your clan, isn’t it?

If evolution is for betterment, how can I be linked with you
To clear this one doubt that haunts me day & night
I am looking at my picture in your showcased book

Sshhhhhh….. stay away from me for a while
For my feelings may be showcased more loudly
Upon seeing theories of your evolution


This write is my response to Express Yourself Contest Week 19 - Feelings.

http://ehsaas.sulekha.com/blog/post/2008/03/express-yourself-contest-week-19-feelings.htm

O my darling! (Face 3)

Distinctly admiring you were
That I cared to keep a big black dot
On your left cheek everyday
To ward off evil eyes that fell on you
O my darling! Are you tired today?

Mischievously wonderful you were
Messing up the house as a toddler
Singing ‘Mama’ ‘Mamaaaaaa’
‘Maa…’ and ‘mmmmm…’ the whole day
O my darling! Do you want to have anything?

A great story teller you are
Your expressive blabbers on pictures and
Innovative adventures with footwear
Are captured in frames in thousands
O my darling! Will you put your head on my lap?

The cars and bats, bricks and books
Lamps and plants, crayons and paper
All have a touching incident to narrate
The intelligence of my boy wonder
O my darling! Have you slept already my dear?

There is never a dull moment
In my life since your grand arrival
For God hath blessed me to be your mother
Though I am not the best you’ve got
O my darling! Will you remember me for ever?


P.S. I am shocked to read the following news item in today’s (10/03/2008) Gulf Daily News:

A newborn baby was found abandoned in a cardboard box next to a municipality garbage bin in Hamad Town, it emerged yesterday. The boy, believed to be a few days old, was discovered near Roundabout Seven by garbage collectors in the early hours of Saturday.

Bahrain is a place where pregnancy preventive measures are available whereas abortion is not. This news is highly disturbing for me because such incidents are a rarity here. Hence incoherent thoughts cross my mind…

• How will the mother be able to lead a peaceful life after abandoning her baby? Let us not ignore the fact that she took great care in keeping the baby in a cardboard box in spite of her compelling situation.
• How did she manage to hide her pregnancy and subsequent delivery?
• Is illegal abortion far better than abandoning the illegal new born baby?
• So many couples are dying to have a baby and are ready to undergo painful processes of artificial insemination, test tubes and surrogacy (in the extreme level). But accidental conceiving and abandoning are also happening side by side. Strange is the law of life….
• Why is the baby punished for no fault of his?

Urged by the overflowing emotions, I penned down the third part of ‘O my darling’ in haste. It is a sweet talk of a mother to her adopted child.

Maha Shivratri

The image of Shiva was never a part of our altar. One probable reason could be we were Vishnu followers. It doesn’t mean that our parents worshipped only Vishnu and the many avatars. The irony was Durga, Ganesha and Muruga found their places in our home whereas neither Shiva nor Linga could. No Rudram or Chamakam were chanted at home and I had never heard them until a few years ago.

But our visits to Shiva temple were quite regular and abhishekams were conducted from time to time. In fact, my parents conducted nagar pratishta in Shiva temple only. I remember how much I liked going to the temple to enjoy the ambience of the big area covered with trees, the big Nandi, Linga, Nayanmars etc. We were advised not to carry even vibhoothi from the temple as it is said, “Shivan sothu kula naasam”. As a young girl, how fascinated I used to be seeing the small idols of nayanmars kept in the line and wondered what on earth they were kept there and why they were the only privileged ones to see Lord Shiva. Well, when I think about them, I could only chuckle.

When we visited Murudeshwar temple near Udipi last July (2007), I was stunned by the beauty, grace and poise of the tall Shiva statue. The temple is constructed in the sea and it is a wonderful sight to see those waves lashing on one side and the Shiva on the other side (see picture above).

Shiva is an embodiment of compassion and love. Whenever I see His picture, I become so humble. The whole universe is at His mercy yet His simplicity makes me realize how petty I am. So, today being Maha Shivratri, I wish to spend my time more usefully that generates positive energy in and around.

Om Namashivaya!

Moods of pain

My teary eyes and burning heart
Fired up the cool autumnal pond
Sending waves of failures of love
Pain was infectious…

Those fresh lotus petals turned together
To see the elegant lady who was charring
Their lives of beauty to ashes
Pain demanded attention…

One dared to touch my red eyes
In a bid to soothe my flaming being
And asked for reason with compassion
Pain expected sympathy…

Brought home the pink flower
To narrate my story of baseless love
That bent my will beyond imagination
Pain had tall tales…



Looking at my face on the mirror of no magic
I decided to disintegrate the radiating beauty
And merge in the blue canvas of cosmos
Pain could not be erased…

From behind the curtains of rainbow memories
His handsome face emerged effortlessly
That thrust me in the corner sobbing
Pain yearned to brood…



Like a single leaf left alone in a storm
I shivered upon those besmeared words
That boiled my brain only to end in swoon
Pain was unbearable…

Woke up with the tap of lotus
That wanted me to smile awhile
And feel the purity of love around
Pain stood aside…


P.S. This is my contribution for 'Express Yourself Contest Week 16'
Picture courtesy - reflector

The ultimatum

Ruptured window of my car
Testified the storm outside
And a glimpse of ferocity

Touching the lines of partition
My eyes noticed water lines
Dripping near my feet

Shifting my gaze to the glass
I extended my vision to the sky
In a limitless velocity

Refusing to erase or get razed
My past mocked in unison
To claim a seat of beat

Reasoning my being of presence
I realised my body in shackles
That became my goal of pain

Held up in the land of known
I raised my voice for help
To avoid the cruel death pavilion

None saw the storm raging inside
As my deeds were mistaken for
A stain in my life of vain

Piercing those solid glass pieces
My soul succumbed to the ultimatum
And flew joyfully towards the oblivion


P.S. This is my contribution for Poetry Contest Week 15
Picture courtesy - Supriya

One of the unforgettable moments – a quick look back

The day I was informed of my mother’s illness and her serious condition, I packed a small baggage of clothes and flew to Mumbai immediately. Never gave a thought how my son and husband would manage without me, given the fact the erratic work timings of my husband. At that time, I didn’t know that I would return home only after two months but victorious.

Amma developed an imbalance in oxygen and carbon-dioxide ratio in her blood, due to which she was literally kissing death every day of her stay in ICU for 22 days. My sisters did come and stay for a week or 10 days but their work schedule back in Chennai could not allow them beyond that.

Amma’s fair hands and thighs became black due to blood tests conducted twice a day. I had to cut her thick, long hair short out of compulsion (of course with her permission in a semi-conscious state) as it was becoming unmanageable to comb what with all the tubes around. Still she was grace personified.

It was my brother and I, who accompanied Amma back from the hospital in a semi-conscious condition on the evening of 22nd January, 2007. My brother had to join duty on 23rd as he had already taken leave for more than a month.

I was left all alone to manage my mother. In fact, the doctors had clearly stated that there might not be any improvement in her condition and that she may have to live in this condition for the rest of her life, given her weight and age factors.

A sudden shrill went through my spine – what if I goof up something, what if I sleep in the night when her oxygen cylinder becomes empty, what if I don’t set her bipap properly, what if she doesn’t respond to whatever I do or give, what if I don’t hear when she cries for my help……. endless sleepless nights and nightmares or it looked so…….

She responded beautifully to my hand of care. In fact, I treated her like my little child. I was thrilled to see the improvements in her everyday, which I would report to my brother promptly in the night. She was positive to my encouraging words.

I was overjoyed every time when she could grasp a spoon with shaking hands, a glass of water with spillage here and there, medicines swallowed as whole instead of powdering them, sitting on the bed then falling on the bed immediately, her first failed and faltered step, her stepping out of the bedroom with my support, her satisfied look upon sitting on the sofa of the living room, her renewed interest at the television serial, her supported walk to bathroom, her reaction to the first droplets of water that fell on her……

It was a miracle, so said the doctors. It was all possible because of

• prayers of well wishers
• mother’s positive thinking
• brother’s unconditional support
• my son’s understanding
• my husband’s kind gesture

She is now without oxygen support, walks on her own inside the house and lives a cheerful life.

God is all merciful that He wants her children to enjoy the love of at least one parent for some more time as my father died 11 years back.


P.S. This article is written only from my point of view